So many times in relationships we push & push for our significant other to let us in and tell us everything that is on their mind. We dont even realize that we could possibly be part of the problem by not allowing that person to work things out in their own mind before coming to us about it. Maybe they truly dont want to talk about it or maybe they just need a minute to get their thoughts together so that when they do decide to speak it will make sense to us.
Being in a relationship and knowing when to continually push your way into their thoughts or knowing when to just fall back and allow them space is probably one of the trickiest parts of being with someone. We tend to feel like we are being pushed away or that the other person is not letting us in and in some instances that might also be the case. Yet, we have to learn our partner so that we can know how to deal accordingly. Its not always going to be easy and its going to require a lot of patience but the end result will hopefully be a more secure, more open relationship.
People like myself tend to shut down when to many things around me are going on and I dont know how to deal. I usually pull back into my own thoughts and ultimately pull away from my partner. Im learning as I get older and as I take my relationships to new depths that this is not only unfair to the people around me but also unfair to myself because Im not allowing someone to be truly there for me. In a way I feel like I am sheltering those closest to me from my problems by trying to deal with them on my own but really Im showing them that I dont trust them enough to help me when I truly need them most. I never want someone to make me feel that way and im continually working towards opening up more and allowing myself to trust more.
